Passion or logic

October 6th, 2011

Put two cell phones side by side – CP1 and CP2. CP1 is better than CP2 – higher quality camera, faster processor, lighter, longer battery life, greater functionality. Both have access to the same apps (or near enough) and both can be synchronized and backed up in an easy, convenient manner. Size is similar, as is price, as is appearance and structure.

The decision is easy right? You choose the iPhone, regardless of if the iPhone is CP1 or CP2.

Of 100 colleagues, 65 of them said they would choose the iPhone because it is ‘better’. When asked to elaborate on what ‘better’ meant, the majority of those 65 respondents replied with a round-about-way of saying ‘just is’.

They were saying Passion. Logic is out the window and the same passion that drives the love for Manchester United FC, the New York Yankees or Collingwood AFC drives the love for iDevices.

There are two ways you can own followers – be the sole provider of a product or service giving the end user no choice, or, derive such passion that by simply adding another lens to a smart phone camera the world stands and applauds.

I have read some stupid articles about how iFollowers display characteristics of cult followers. There is no trickery, no false hope, no manipulation or mind washing (well, no more than any other consumer brand). It is… love. It is love for success, it is love for sex appeal, it is love for functionality, it is love for simplicity, it is love for reliability. It is love for loyalty.

On May five when the world was advised of Steve Jobs’ passing, the dank mood that is usually reserved for the passing of highly respected world leaders, philanthropists and entertainers settled upon the greater populous. You could argue that he was each of these even if he was in its barest form, merely the brains behind an electronic manufacturer.

He became a stakeholder in our lives. He brought the world a better way to go about our daily grind.

If I had time

September 9th, 2011

You get the same weekly allocation as everyone else. Twenty four hours, seven days.

Unless your medical practioner advises you otherwise, life may as well be endless – you might be the record breaking individual to live to 175. Beyond. Maybe you won’t.

Anthony Robbins was in Sydney recently. He raised the issue of blaming time for not achieving the things you want to. It’s just another story, like the reason why you didn’t do your homework or why you don’t go to the gym any more or why you don’t call your mother. It’s a tale that masks the real reason – that there are things you’d just rather be doing instead.

A friend and I came to an argument about this recently. She is smarter than I’ll ever be, much better looking, and a pioneer in her industry.

She was blaming time for not actioning something which she suggested was important to her. I suggested that she had 24 hours worth of other things that she’d rather be doing.

Have you ever heard somebody say that they didn’t have time to prepare and consume a bowl of cookie-dough ice cream? Or that they didn’t have time to buy themselves that killer new 3D tele? But somehow, cleaning up the garage and washing the car fell by the wayside.

Maybe you are unmotivated. Maybe you have a hectic schedule. Maybe both.

But time is probably not the concern.

Do these pants make me look ***?

September 2nd, 2011

Yes, they probably do.

If you ask, you are probably in two situations: you have a body image issue, or they do actually make you look ***. Your instincts are right, good for you.

Assuming you don’t have a body image issue, which would place you in a 3% minority, you may need to face the fact that this particular item of clothing will make you look ***. You may actually be *** and the item of clothing you have chosen would be more suited to someone less ***. If you are ***, that’s fine, you are in the greater majority and many a *** person has gone on to live a long and prosperous life.

Some people would consider Nigella Lawson to be ***, but that is not to say that she is not greatly respected, and I am confident that there would be many a member of the opposite sex who would respect the sh*t out of her given the consensual opportunity. Same could be said for Jack Black.

My point is that there is really only one answer to the question. ‘Who cares?!’

You probably aren’t ***, you have probably just acquired an item of clothing that would be better suited to a different body shape. And there will be hundreds of alternatives that will look smokin’ on your hot frame. Ask your partner, you will probably find that ‘nude’ is a good start. And probably a good finish.

And besides all that, is the point of the dress-up to look nice or skinny? Whether or not the item of clothing makes you look *** may well be beside the point. The item of clothing may indeed not make you look ***, but may leave you looking like an idiot. Hats indoors, sunglasses indoors, shoes in a boat – these items won’t make you look *** but that is the least of your worries.

If a footballer with footballer legs sports a pair of skinny jeans, they won’t make him look fat, not by any stretch, but they will make him look like an idiot, like a white guy with a homie limp.

Everyone wants to look nice but let’s not confuse ‘nice’ with ‘skinny’. And let’s not confuse *** with anything larger than ‘athlete fit’.

Honestly, who knows, you may well be ***. But that’s not to say you aren’t one sexy motherfucker.